ic inbox.

Jul. 27th, 2022 01:10 am
heatmetal: (Default)
[personal profile] heatmetal
[ his voicemail greeting is just a guitar riff ]

Date: 2022-08-17 03:13 pm (UTC)
camarod: (39)
From: [personal profile] camarod
[there is, for one blissful whole thirty-forty seconds, a huge swell of gratitude, of fondness. of relief to have someone be able to know him without the preamble of having to say what he means, what he feels. without having to explain himself.

then it's back to that wired uncertainty; that age old Billy Terror of messing up. ]


We gotta tell Steve. I'll figure how to to pull myself out - I know it's a lot -

Date: 2022-08-17 03:24 pm (UTC)
camarod: (100)
From: [personal profile] camarod
I'm just saying, it's a big deal - [okay, okay. he can chill. he's chill (he's not).

it is a big deal though. ]
Okay, okay. I think because it's new, I'm like - gravitating towards you like a magnet?

Date: 2022-08-17 03:28 pm (UTC)
camarod: (Default)
From: [personal profile] camarod
[maybe - ]

No, no like - I just wanna sit in there for a bit. Like a hot shower? I don't fucking know dude. Like when you're a kid and you wanna go through your folks stuff, or just sit on their bed for a bit.

Date: 2022-08-17 03:43 pm (UTC)
camarod: (97)
From: [personal profile] camarod
Not all of you should be though, is the thing.

[there is a returning thing: it's bedsheets that smell like floral tones and fresh air. a little like sea salt, warm and safe, and then cold, empty and slightly stale. there's the feeling of missing the sea salt, of missing arms around him, of soft singing. these are all Billy's private things - things that are his. he's making a point.

but then Eddie is close, and Billy feels that other kind of warmth. the relief, the fondness. ]

Date: 2022-08-17 04:00 pm (UTC)
camarod: (96)
From: [personal profile] camarod
You're worried about your ugly parts? Eddie, look at who you're talking to.

[he's all ugly parts, more or less: hurt; angry; slightly bitter. ] We'll figure it out, man. Eventually.

[it's so juvenile, how he wants to curl up now. like that's something you do with your friends, put your head in their lap to feel close to them, or wrap your arms around them to feel the anchor of being alive. ]

- Thanks. Thanks for - this.

Date: 2022-08-17 04:08 pm (UTC)
camarod: (95)
From: [personal profile] camarod
[his head goes temple to shoulder. it feels, somehow, more intimate than having been in Eddie's head. ]

Your generous friend sounds exhausting. But he's fine. More or less.

[generous. ha. ] If I start growing tentacles, you promise to take me out?

Date: 2022-08-17 04:12 pm (UTC)
camarod: (107)
From: [personal profile] camarod
Appreciate it, killer.

[that's a relief too. ] I wonder how close I gotta be to be like, in your head.

Date: 2022-08-17 04:15 pm (UTC)
camarod: (113)
From: [personal profile] camarod
I guess we test it out when I drive back home?

[and - okay, yes. a use for it. and if - if it's safe, he wonders if Eddie could just, piggyback off of him to connect with others? hm. ]

I don't know what's worse, though - those goddamn walkie talkies, or having a bunch of us in your head.

Date: 2022-08-17 04:18 pm (UTC)
camarod: (Default)
From: [personal profile] camarod
The kids are not getting in. Steve - maybe.

Date: 2022-08-17 08:28 pm (UTC)
camarod: (006)
From: [personal profile] camarod
Just vibes. Some Madonna.

Date: 2022-08-17 11:07 pm (UTC)
camarod: (011)
From: [personal profile] camarod
ABBA’s so fucking depressing dude. Those lyrics? Yeesh.

[this is comfortable. Eddie’s shoulder is a little bony, a little awkward at this angle, but it’s comfortable with him also just there at the edge of his consciousness. a flickering little neighbour that feels like safety.

it’s real fucking novel, if he’s honest. he’s never felt safe before. let’s that one slip out before he can contain it. ]


I bet he’d like the Stones. Or KISS. Something he can dance to.

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heatmetal: (Default)
eddie munson.

August 2022

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