ic inbox.

[heatmetal]

[ his voicemail greeting is just a guitar riff ]

Comments

[retromix]

Bats, cats, rats ...

[ Listen to this very real suggestion: ]

Maybe try and bring all the hats in the city to you.

[heatmetal]

[ god he loves a stupid stupid man. ]

Okay babe. Lemme try.

[retromix]

[ A respectful silence ensues, then: ]

... Are any hats coming?

[heatmetal]

No, babe. I think things gotta have a brain to respond to me.

[retromix]

Oh. Makes sense, I guess. Magical rules for the talking.

[ Steve wanders back to the car, climbing in to keep an eye on Eddie's progress as he gets comfortable. ]

You're doing great! Try more!

[heatmetal]

[ so he's got a gaggle of cats. After a few false starts - there are also a few rats. Who are... Way better conversationalists than the cats. They're smarter. More eager to chat with him about the city. ]

[retromix]

[ Steve's watching. Sometimes snapping pictures on his phone and feeling like a discount Jonathan Byers, all his shots are less artistic than straightforward. Eddie looks cool though and the animals (even the rats, ew) seem to like him a lot, so he isn't in any danger. Not immediately.

He folds his arms on the steering wheel, cheek pillowed on an arm.

Gonna text him: ]

Cute view.

[heatmetal]

Is this Disney princess shit doing it for you?

[ he seems like he's having a great time, though. Like all these poor misunderstood critters are his flock to tend to and it comes as natural as breathing.

[retromix]

[ If one of those cats isn't named Dustin after all of this ... ]

You're sweet, is all.

[heatmetal]

Not as sweet as you.

[ he might end up with a cat after all of this. The scrawniest and ugliest of them is getting pretty cozy on his lap. ]

[retromix]

Looks like you got a new favorite there.

[heatmetal]

He won't fucking leave. It's Henderson all over again.

[retromix]

[ Freaking called it, he's a prophet. Steve summons a cat carrier in the car. ]

Alright, both of you back in the car.

[heatmetal]

[ he bids farewell to his adoring public, keeping the grubby kitten with him as he stands and makes his way to the van.

He might be pretty when he gets cleaned up. His temperament is sweet, judging by the only reaction to being held out for inspection being a mindless purr. ]

Say hi to your new kid, Stevie.

[retromix]

Another one to start up a college fund for.

[ He nods to the carrier pointedly. ]

In there, please, while in the car. We'll go find a vet, that's gonna be a good idea if it's been living on the streets.

[heatmetal]

You're about to regret everything, lil man.

[ Eddie obliges and the kitten immediately makes his displeasure known. At least until he drops the carrier on his lap. ]

[retromix]

[ Steve's gaze slides to the road as he starts the car. Looks like a day of vet bills and kitty baths are ahead, with no idea if they can even keep it in the hotel. Lots of lying is in the cards to the poor Diadem staff. ]

What's little Hellfire's name gonna be?

[heatmetal]

You know it's gotta be Henderson. If he turns up here and we haven't made it abundantly clear he's still number one, he'll throw a fit.

[ he sticks his fingers through the cage. ]

Might soften the whole 'by the way we're dating' blow.

[retromix]

[ We're dating. A smile flits over Steve's features. ]

He won't care beyond finding any excuse to have us in the same room and playing DND.

[heatmetal]

He'll be mortally offended any time we're hanging out without him.

[ buuuut ]

You will be obligated to join Hellfire.

[retromix]

Nope, not playing.

[ Steve eyes him in the mirror as he drives. ]

Listen, there's not a lot I wouldn't do for you but sitting down at a table for hours and rolling dice for fun does not appeal.

[heatmetal]

Have those little shits seriously not explained the game to you in all these years?

[retromix]

Uh huh, I'm selectively deaf.

[ He rolls down his window and ruffles his hair, enjoying the fresh breeze. ]

Look, I love you but no. [ Whoa, hold on, ] Y'know? Like, yeah, I ... I just don't wanna play.

[ Jesus sweet Christ. ]

[heatmetal]

[ uuhhh.

Eddies suddenly going Red, worrying his teeth between his lips to try to suppress the smile. ]

I'm just saying, Stevie. It's all the shit you clearly love about fighting monsters with none of the actual mortal peril.

[retromix]

Mortal peril's my favorite part!

[ HAHA. Ha. ]