ic inbox.

[heatmetal]

[ his voicemail greeting is just a guitar riff ]

Comments

[camarod]

Yeah, she is. She’s a pain in the ass, though.

[ hmmmm. ] She’s just a kid, Eddie. They’re just - kids.

[heatmetal]

[ they're all just kids. all of them here, all of them home. can't even legally drink yet. ]

It's fucked.

[camarod]

You know I nearly went college?

[softly, thoughtful.] Full ride. Just needed money for the gas. I would’ve been free in two months.

[he hasn’t told anyone this. ] But I decided I was gonna fuck Karen Wheeler and well, the rest is history. Karma, probably.

[heatmetal]

[ that's...

that's a lot in a handful of sentences. stumbling right at the finish line. same as eddie had. he pressesl his lips together. ]

What happened to you wasn't karma, man. The town's cursed by a man who hates the world almost as much as he hates himself.

[camarod]

They can be mutually exclusive.

[a beat. ] Don’t tell Harrington about Mrs Wheeler.

[heatmetal]

Nah, man... what you tell me? All in confidence.

[ that's friendship. and he knows how to keep his mouth shut, unlike steve. ]

... you know how I died. You think that was karma too?

[camarod]

Absolutely fucking not. You’re a teddybear.

[heatmetal]

But I'm not innocent.

[ he sets the kitten back on the bed. ]

And neither were you. What happened to us - that wasn't karma, or comeuppance, or whatever... it was just tragedy.

[camarod]

I really, really - just. Was so fucking close.

[ and now ? ] I guess this is - it’s decent payoff. Us. Harrington.

[heatmetal]

Yeah.

[ ... ]

Still not convinced this isn't some kinda fucked up afterlife.

[camarod]

Yeah? Yeah, maybe. Never really believed in anything after.

[heatmetal]

Can't say I really did, either.... least not the way the church spun it.

[ granted he'd only ever been to a church a few times. wayne wasn't the religious sort, and his father had never believed in anything that wasn't himself. ]

[camarod]

My old man was real big on Hell whenever I stepped out of line.

[he means got a little too close with anyone not fitting Neil's perfect little all American image. ]

I kind of thought I'd just stop. Used to be comforting.

[heatmetal]

[ ... and what a terrible thought that is. billy, being so desperate for freedom, that oblivion was a comfort.

eddie can't say he doesn't get it. ]

I spent a really long time wanting to just disappear. [ an uncertain pause. ] And then when it was actually happening, all I wanted was more time.

I'm glad we both got more time. Here. Together.

[camarod]

Yeah - [comes out in one breathless little wheeze. He hadn't been ready, not really. ]

Yeah. Me too. I think Hawkins might've killed us in the end, anyway. Sucked out all the shit that makes us us, in the end.

[heatmetal]

The town's a tarpit. [ he agrees. ] If it doesn't kill you, it just traps you until something else does...

[ and here? they're free. to be themselves. to love whoever they want to. it's... it's hard. and for some ineffable reason he wants to go back. for the kids. for his uncle. but there's no denying his future is brighter here than home. ]

What were you gonna study? At school, I mean.

[camarod]

- Double major, probably. Politics and, I don't know. History? Lit?

[He hums, low. Dreams that are a little impossible now and then. He isn't sure he would have done well in college, but he knows he would have tried. Tried so fucking hard if it meant getting out from under Neil's thumb. ]

[heatmetal]

Lit, huh? Never would've guessed.

[ the politics don't surprise him. ]

[camarod]

I've read the classics, E.

[heatmetal]

Not the classics that matter.

[camarod]

Hey, hey - I read The Lion, The Witch, and The Wardrobe.

[heatmetal]

[ oh wait hold up ]

You've read Narnia? Mmm... Guess that is required reading for every closeted guy.

[camarod]

Don't you know it's a wholesome Christian allegory, Eddie?

[heatmetal]

Nah. I got hung up thinking about what Mr. Tumnus' dick would look like.

[camarod]

You goddamn freak, you leave Mr. Tumnus alone.

[he's laughing - ] Caspian and Lilliandil had me a chokehold. I never knew if it was my fucking mommy and daddy issues or if I wanted in there.