ic inbox.

[heatmetal]

[ his voicemail greeting is just a guitar riff ]

Comments

[camarod]

Look at us, a real couple of chips off the old block.

[ha!! ]

Anyway, I should keep this place for work. I don’t think I can handle Steve finding a sex toy and asking questions.

[heatmetal]

[ okay, that gets a full cackle. He tries to imagine it. ]

Good idea. It'll be a lot less to explain if the kids show up, too.

[camarod]

We’d need a bigger goddamn house.

[a full on mcmansion -]

Eddie, Eddie stop. Think of my poor dick. Don’t jinx this.

[heatmetal]

Relax. By the time we need a bigger place I'll be filthy rich.

[camarod]

Oh, oh please explain this one to me.

[heatmetal]

Apparently, by 2022 standards, I am both searingly hot and untouchably popular.

[camarod]

Oh shit - you took off? I knew it! They fucking love a dude with a guitar.

[heatmetal]

Yeah, yep. They looooooove the mini painting, too. And the D&D stories. [ Eddie laughs, a little helpless. ] And the cat - shit, have you met Henderson yet?

[camarod]

Shit, I forgot you had a cat.

[heatmetal]

He's a mouthy little shit, just like his namesake.

[ he has no idea where said cat is. but a black lump near the top of the bed stretches out and yawns. ]

[camarod]

Oh, you’re like, imprinting.

[heatmetal]

[ eddie glances over his shoulder, reaching out to grab the moving sootball and holds it up to the camera. the kitten is Small - small enough to still fit fairly comfortably in his hand - and purrs. ]

The real reason Steve and I are dating is because we're co-parenting his six brats.

[camarod]

[oh he’s cute - ]

I’m the cool uncle to that cat only.

[heatmetal]

Obviously.

[camarod]

Maybe that kid with the cool powers.

[heatmetal]

That's the only one I haven't met.

[ which sucks!! ]

I said if we breakup I get the Sinclairs and - [ the word is halfway out his mouth before he thinks about it ] Max.

[camarod]

That shitbird bites

[it’s half fond. ] You met her. Max.

[heatmetal]

[ it occurs to him that they haven't really spoken about it. about max. the grief. ]

Yeah. She and Henderson were the ones who insisted upon my innocence and roped everybody else into trying to clear my name... and she's also my neighbor.

[camarod]

Mm. Yeah, Steve gave me the abridged run down.

[the divorce. the coma. his face does a thing: pinched and visible guilt twisting up his mouth. ]

She’s stubborn. Not surprised.

[heatmetal]

She's a good kid. A real good kid.

[ genuinely good. he wiggles henderson the cat, bumps his nose lightly to the kitten's. ]

Way too cool to hang out with my little misfits, that's for sure.

[camarod]

Yeah, she is. She’s a pain in the ass, though.

[ hmmmm. ] She’s just a kid, Eddie. They’re just - kids.

[heatmetal]

[ they're all just kids. all of them here, all of them home. can't even legally drink yet. ]

It's fucked.

[camarod]

You know I nearly went college?

[softly, thoughtful.] Full ride. Just needed money for the gas. I would’ve been free in two months.

[he hasn’t told anyone this. ] But I decided I was gonna fuck Karen Wheeler and well, the rest is history. Karma, probably.

[heatmetal]

[ that's...

that's a lot in a handful of sentences. stumbling right at the finish line. same as eddie had. he pressesl his lips together. ]

What happened to you wasn't karma, man. The town's cursed by a man who hates the world almost as much as he hates himself.

[camarod]

They can be mutually exclusive.

[a beat. ] Don’t tell Harrington about Mrs Wheeler.